Regrettably, some doctors deliver bad news badly. This delivery can occur in obstetric infertility clinics as much as in any other specialty. Telling a woman that she is sterile or a man that he has a low sperm count can be devastating, especially since a couple that has not been able to conceive often wants a child more than they have ever wanted anything in their lives.
Sometimes this diagnosis is accurate, and sometimes it is not. Most of us know of cases where a couple tries and tries unsuccessfully to have a child. After giving up hope and beginning the adoption process, they conceive successfully. At least one factor contributing to this phenomenon is a relaxation of anxiety.
Once a couple stops trying to conceive, their attention goes elsewhere, even if to the grieving process. This distraction may allow the body to relax enough (and lower the stress hormone cortisol, which impacts the brain’s secretion of the female hormones needed for pregnancy) to allow pregnancy, much as an athlete can per-form better if attention is, in part, directed away from the performance at hand.
The work of Alice Domar at Harvard’s Mind/Body Center for Women’s Health suggests that letting go of the focus to have a baby and using relaxation and guided visual imagery to relax— focusing on personal happiness—can do wonders to treat anxiety. Paradoxically, 44% of women with infertility in her study became pregnant.
The point is not to offer false hope, but to illustrate that the stress of anxiety at a molecular level is real and can have a direct impact on your health and fertility. Getting treatment for your anxiety can improve your life, whether you have a child or not.